There's no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard...

I'm feeling so stuck these days. I'm stuck in my stupid job, that I hate. I'm stuck with my thoughts - which terrify me, sometimes. And I'm stuck in this routine, that I need to get away from. I need a change - I need to get off my ass and start working out and lose this extra ten pounds I've been carrying around for months. I'm starting to feel pretty bad about myself. Wow, do I ever need a pick-me-up.

I did have a fun weekend, but right now it doesn't even seem to matter.

It started off with errands, then swimming at Paul's parents' house, on Saturday. But then I had to go in to work for a few hours, which ruined the whole night. Sunday we got up early and headed off to the Humane Society Walk a Thon. It was beautiful outside (+30 C) and it was a fun afternoon. Ruby and Olivia loved it.










After that, we headed back to Paul's parents' house to go swimming again, and have a BBQ. It was a good night, and then we went to bed super early - 11pm - because we were sun-soaked and exhausted.

And yet somehow I still feel like something's missing - like I need to get away. It's only a few weeks until I get to go see my favourite band (Spill Canvas) and only a month until we are headed to the cottage for a few days. But that can't come soon enough. And once July is gone, the summer is half over and then what? August? Then fall - winter? Ughh.

I'm going to go walk the dogs and then do a small work-out the basement - maybe I can ease myself back into this, slowly. My plan to get pregnant right away, before I'd have to get myself back into "shape" is quickly fading, which puts me in an even worse mood, when I think about it. I guess I'll put my focus on losing ten pounds rather than getting pregnant, and we'll see what happens.

"Happy" Tuesday...