It's you, and your heart.

I haven't really had anything interesting to write about recently, hence my lack of posts. I'm so stuck in routine that I feel like if I wrote here every day it would be the same stuff, over and over. Boorr-ing.

It's a beautiful day outside today - I just got back in from walking the dogs for about an hour. I have been jogging every other day for an hour, as well, and last night I went indoor rock climbing with a few friends. I'd love to start climbing weekly, but my work schedule hardly allow it. Plus, the gym is in Guelph and I don't drive - which makes it more difficult. I do love climbing, though, and man are my forearms sore today.

I've been doing alot of baking, as well, which sort of contradicts my being healthy/working out, but I don't mind. I made a chocolate chip cheesecake this past weekend - I used a regular cheesecake recipe and added a bit of cocoa powder and chocolate chips, it turns out amazing. There are two pieces left, frozen, in our freezer that I am dying to eat. We promised two of our friends we'd save them each a piece.

I'm re-making the Triple Chocolate Cupcakes from my last post, this weekend for Father's Day. They were the best cupcakes I've ever had and everyone loved them, so they will make a return. I wanted to try something new, but Paul insisted we have the cupcakes again. I'm not entirely sure when I'll have time to make them, since I work tonight and tomorrow, as well as Saturday during the day. After work on Saturday I'll have to shower and change quickly, then we are running out to a Stag and Doe, then a home-coming party for a close friend. I guess I'm getting up early on Sunday to make those bad boys.

The pups are now bugging me to go outside, and how can I say no? It's sunny and warm and I think I'll go get some sun while they play in their new kiddie pool - sorta like this, from last weekend:



Happy Thursday (only two days til the weekend!)

I want you staplegunned right to my side, all of the time.

I made the best cupcakes on the planet, on Sunday. I was looking through my new dessert cookbook and also decided on a cheesecake of some sort, but then I headed back over to Annie's Eats to her cupcake page and found Triple Chocolate Cupcakes. I was sold.



I made them completely from scratch, following the recipe loosely. The cupcakes were moist and amazing and the pudding filling and the chocolate cream cheese frosting were awesome. I'm in love with these cupcakes. I will make them again and again.

Tomorrow is my day off and I plan on doing a full clean of the house. We've been doing quick cleans for a few weeks now, cleaning the living room cause we're having people over, clean the bedroom cause it looked like a tornado tore through it. But I am feeling the need to really clean. I'll also go for a run in the morning and then do an afternoon work out in the basement. I've been keeping up with my work outs pretty well, except the weekend, because there was no time. And besides the cupcakes shown above, I've been eating healthy, too. Salads at work - instead of deep fryer crap or nachos or pizza. At home, I always eat healthy, fruit, veggies, veggie burgers. Anyway, I think I'm doing good so far. I hope I can keep it up.

I'm off to walk the dogs and then make lunch - brocolli patty on a bun!

Oh, hello, Motivation, there you are.

Something happened in my head sometime in the past two days - not sure what exactly it was but I'm glad it happened. I am completely 100% motivated to get off my ass and do something to get back in shape.

I plan on continuing to eat healthy (I am vegetarian, I always sort of eat healthy), but I'll be taking out almost all the junk food that I've been consuming over the past six months. I don't think I'll be able to cut it out completely, especially living with my husband who loves chips and snacks (who am I kidding, I love them too).

I am going to try not to eat past ten p.m., unless it's fruit or veggies. I usually eat dinner at work around eight, so after that - no food unless a very healthy snack when I get home.

As for working out - today was DAY ONE. I jogged/walked 1.7 miles (2.75 km) this morning, and then I spent another hour in the basement working out when I got back. Two hours work-out today, and I feel great. Tomorrow I am meeting a friend at her gym and if I like it I think I'll get a membership. It's an women's gym - I think I'll like it.

I'm excited. I feel very alive at this moment, and I hope it never leaves me. I sort of want to start fresh - take advantage of this one thing that I have control over, completely. I still have to go to my crappy job and I still have to wait to getaway (another month, anyway), but for now, I can do this, for myself.

Thank you to everyone who encouraged me yesterday. I really, really needed it.

There's no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard...

I'm feeling so stuck these days. I'm stuck in my stupid job, that I hate. I'm stuck with my thoughts - which terrify me, sometimes. And I'm stuck in this routine, that I need to get away from. I need a change - I need to get off my ass and start working out and lose this extra ten pounds I've been carrying around for months. I'm starting to feel pretty bad about myself. Wow, do I ever need a pick-me-up.

I did have a fun weekend, but right now it doesn't even seem to matter.

It started off with errands, then swimming at Paul's parents' house, on Saturday. But then I had to go in to work for a few hours, which ruined the whole night. Sunday we got up early and headed off to the Humane Society Walk a Thon. It was beautiful outside (+30 C) and it was a fun afternoon. Ruby and Olivia loved it.










After that, we headed back to Paul's parents' house to go swimming again, and have a BBQ. It was a good night, and then we went to bed super early - 11pm - because we were sun-soaked and exhausted.

And yet somehow I still feel like something's missing - like I need to get away. It's only a few weeks until I get to go see my favourite band (Spill Canvas) and only a month until we are headed to the cottage for a few days. But that can't come soon enough. And once July is gone, the summer is half over and then what? August? Then fall - winter? Ughh.

I'm going to go walk the dogs and then do a small work-out the basement - maybe I can ease myself back into this, slowly. My plan to get pregnant right away, before I'd have to get myself back into "shape" is quickly fading, which puts me in an even worse mood, when I think about it. I guess I'll put my focus on losing ten pounds rather than getting pregnant, and we'll see what happens.

"Happy" Tuesday...